#AskTheInstitute 006

Question: What do I do when I fail?

Failure really is a part of life, but that doesn't mean that it's easy. I'm not the one who is going to tell you to "seek out opportunities to fail" or "if you don't fail everyday you aren't living up to your potential." Both of these statements have been given to me as advice but it think it points out a fundamental flaw in how we view failure as a society. We will either tend to romanticize failure (saying it's a great thing) or demonize failure (saying that its the end of the world). Victory over failure comes when we see it for what it is. That's the part that's hard. Can we look our own failures in the face, no filter, and accept what we see?

Once we look failure in the face we can do these three steps to begin to come to terms with it.

1. Process the Outcome - It is likely that people have told you that you should just push through failure, but simply pushing through without taking time to analyze how the failure has affected you is a recipe for internalized hurt. Give yourself time to process emotionally and analytically. Ask yourself how it made you feel and what were the actions that led up to you feeling that way.

2. Plan for the Future - Failure is not the end! Once you accept the failure for what it is then you will see that now you have a whole new starting point. So make a plan! Given the new situation how are you going to move towards your purpose?

3. Proceed with the Plan - Don't give up! Don't lose hope! Your story is still being written so make good on the plan you just created. Don't sell yourself short by letting failure get the victory.

Always remember this, fear kills more dreams than failure.